Sunday, December 23, 2012
Recently Miz Know It All was taken to task by a young woman for being callus in both her wording and her choice of tone. Both of which are in fact somewhat true. Miz Know It All can, and she often does show a certain hardness usually characteristic of, and evidenced by, those jaded by the passing of time. While that may be true to a certain extent, there are other more compelling reasons she seems so hardened!.
The young woman in question seemed to feel (and rightly I might add) that those of us who have in the parlance "Been There, Done That should be more encouraging to those like herself. That if we, having "Been There, Done That," cannot be more caring, more concerned, that we send a meta message of hopelessness! Again she is right... to a point. For you see there is a conundrum faced by every sister when it comes to what she can and does say on line and how. Because it is not just the few who read these words! Rather our words are tossed upon the winds to be read by Lord only knows who! But this much can be said with certainty! Our words are read with a far greater frequency by those who have created a false narrative from others "borrowed words" than they are read by those for whom their narrative was written into the stone of their lives in letters of blood!
This same Conundrum predates the internet by many many years. In fact the word Connudrum was chosen to describe what it means to face the whole of Transsexuality by the writer, Jan Morris and it is with a nod to her that I would now like to borrow the term to describe a more specific facet of what faces those women of history who would dare to put their words down now in the age of instant media!
For the woman of history in the here and now, the conundrum is this... If the words we would like to say are said in the hopes of reaching the young like the woman who took Miz Know It All to task. Then those same words are also being read by the fifty to one, who, searching for ways to hide their own shame at having issues of gender, cannot and will not put forth their own and true narratives! Instead, they read those accounts of transsexuals who really and truly had no choices in the matter, and with neither the same experiences or understanding, they adopt their words as their own! The perfect example being Jan Morris's most famous catch phrase! "A woman trapped in a man's body!" Prior to the publication of her book that phrase, or anything similar was not to be found in any of the narratives offered either to the public or to the gatekeepers! Yet within months of the book hitting the stands, it was how every single account of gender variance became "a woman born into a man's body!" Now either there was actually a sudden and unexplained emergence of women trapped in a men's bodies in 1974, or the term had been borrowe by those for whom it was not, prior to this, part of their narratives! Oh sure there is to be found a certain ease in this phrase in explaining the unexplainable using this easy metaphor. But the point remains that it is curious how this came about.
An example that is closer to home with Miz Know It All is the Phrase "Always a Woman" Which btw, always grates on her very last nerve, because it is simply dreadful English! One cannot have always been a woman unless one has always been an adult female! Children are not and cannot have been woman! Hence it is impossible for one to have "always" been a woman! Now aside from the bastardization of the mother tongue. The main reason this grates so is that it is a bald faced lie! Miz Know It All was friends with the woman who coined this phrase. A woman of history who went by the Nom de Plume "Kate Grimaldi!" What "Kate" was trying to express more than a decade back was that for those born transsexual! and ONLY for those born transsexual. That once all is said and done, in retrospect, it becomes clear that one has always been a female. One who was dealing with what has to be the most horrible hand possible! When Kate first put this out there, there is no small irony in how she was taken to task over and over again by then nascent TG! Who at the time were not about to give up so easily on having had their former glorious man-selves! They had been born male, they had lived as males, and many of them were, then as now, intent upon retaining that which makes one male! More so, before this idea spread and twisted,, the standard narrative for the TG was that they remembered how this grew upon them! Usually it starting with some sexualized exposure to women's clothing as an erotic device somewhere between 13 and 19 give or take a few years and even then it die not become an real issue until their thirties or later... VS. the TS. who to a one had memories of their being at odds with their genitalia going back to their first explorations of self between two and five!
Yet it is with true regret that I remember how well Kate argued her points! Because shortly after this... "the true narrative of the TG" suddenly and completely changed! No longer was there any mention of by them of ever having been aroused by women's clothing! No longer was there any mention of the age of onset being as a tweener to teener, nor of the other part which was how it had grown in intensity as the years progressed!
No, now, beholding of this kernel of "the TS narrative" hand crafted by Kate and then stolen, morphed and parroted back, "they" all suddenly knew "they were always women" while still in utero! "They had always been women" (female, well now! That was, and is still too much of a stretch for those who quite like having that penis O' theirs don't cha know!!) They now have also always known then and yet, somehow, they, unlike us, have managed to survive and not only that but to survive quite well., Well into their fifties, sixties and beyond! This, if bolstered by how with the age of easy access to info about TS being close to fifty years old, that the age of onset of any "gender crisis"seems to have risen in these same TG! Going from a then old age of, forties fifties to now their fifties and sixties and even later! Again it is always done with stolen bits of narrative. All of it partially digested then parroted back about having always struggled with their HUGE issues... but never does it seem to jive how these issues could have been that HUGE or that much of a struggle as they seemed to have little to no problem getting it on with the little woman as men every Saturday night for the last thirty some years or more! Yeahhh... they were always women... right...
Miz Know It All was not the only sister to notice this phenomena and so she did what most of us did! We all started to take the serious discussions about ourselves off line. Having our discussions on originations, on explorations and the like. Conversations that can only come to be known from a life time of learning. All of which is said quietly and well out of ear shot of the TG... Because without fail, it seems that every time something of our knowing leaks out, and if it unfortunately makes it's way into the male minds who mine our narratives for such things... The knowledge would be taken, twisted and then parroted back as their bestest and alwaysest knowing, even if they could not at gun point begin to say what any of it really and truly meant!
So therein lies the conundrum! Do we hope for the best and write only for the ears of those whom we would dearly love to have it go to? Knowing that in the telling for those few, that our words would be harvested by the many, to be made over into a knot of lies? A knowing and telling, which in the end would only serve to make the lives of the few all the harder? Or do we keep our fences up and mended? Pray to the gods we might still pray to, that these few might survive alone as we keep our council and those still unknown quantities to ourselves? Only imparting them when we can directly and one to one. If and only if when we can and only for those for whom they are relative? Alas experience has taught that the latter is the only way!
So it is with my deepest apologies to the young woman, that I cannot and will not become the writer she and I both wish I could be!
Sunday, December 16, 2012
One of the classic ways to delay an advancing force was to burn your bridges behind you! By the act of fire, making what had once been the easy crossing of a physical/geographical barrier became the same difficult if not impossible crossing it had been before the bridge was erected! Needless to say, as useful as this may be to cut off a threat, it also works in reverse as well! If one burns ones bridges, then going back to what was is just as difficult or as impossible! Once that bridge is burnt, there simply is no going back!
This example was such a poignant one to human life that the act of burning a bridge became part of our lexicon! Such that when it is said one has burnt one's bridges, it implies that the one doing the act of burning has done something which simply cannot be undone... The act of telling the boss they are a croaker sack stuffed full of shit comes to mind! While it may be quite satisfying to say it, once done, it is pretty much assured that the sayer is going to be looking for other "opportunities!"
Transition is also one of those things which like the above, once done, cannot be undone! Of for sure... you could cut your hair, toss the ill fitting clothes into the garbage along with the gobs of bad makeup, and restock your Ol' man-self from the Sears Men's Department of ugly clothes... but just as those things which you just purged were but simply trappings of gender and have little to do with ones sex, so to does their counter have little to do with rebuilding what was destroyed when your bridge was burnt!
Honestly? You folks gotta get way more serious about this and stop cheering each other on like lemmings! Cause when the pink fog wears off... There is a hard cold reality that is going to come crashing in that there is no going back! You simply cannot undo the damage done. The damage you have done to your familial relations is forever! The friendships which were lost to this endeavor are gone for good. You cannot set to right the business connections which were soured by your acts. What is done is done, and never will it be as it once was! And that is not even considering if one has had "the surgery" or not! Hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Willy? Well, cut that little old rascal off and he's gone for good and tain't never going to pop his funny looking head up in this world ever again!
But what the hey! More than 80% of "trans-(wo)men" will never have surgery! Why? cause they're planning on keeping 'The Precious!" In fact, hearing them talk, it is not just "The Precious" they think they can hold onto... It seems they are under the delusion they can keep it all! Why the house the status, the kids/grandkids, the job, the little woman, the membership in the Rotary Club, their 401k (minus of course the girl suit they want to buy!) the old drinking buddys! Heck! It seems they are under the delusion that all of can transfer over cause they simply want it to!... Hey! They were men! They know how to do things happen, having spend 50 some years as a men building careers and by God, if they made it, then it's theirs to keep! Just listen to the things they all say to the little wifey! "but I won't change! I'll still be me! I'll just be female! We can even still have sex together as lesbians! Why are you being so mean! Why won't you support me?" Me me me!
Really? Really? The whole point of transition is to NOT be who you were! To NOT be a guy! Tell me? Where did she sign up to be in a lesbian relationship with a man in a dress who pretends to be female? No where? uhu...
Remember transition is an act of burning ones bridges... and what that means to the possibility of return? There isn't one! Even the idea of return is one colossal fail! Remember, when it is gone, it is gone!
I know I know! I can see you saying "big deal!" You're smart people. You are on this side now, so what does it matter? "So what if I crossed my bridge then burnt it! Who the heck cares! I can simply "live as a woman" now!" Ahhh my dear dear campers! Were that life were but so simple! Sadly what is NEVER told to those who run quickly and gayly across their bridged, torches held to the high, is that there is not some bright shinning city called girl town just waiting for them on this side with welcoming arms! There is only a vast and empty wasteland full of the worst sort of hardship and despair! Oh don't get me wrong! There really is that city to be had, but it is a very long ways off. It is nothing like what you think it will be like, and getting there is an act of extremis! One which can only be done if one is completely willing to leave all the things from the old life, as well as anything which they were foolish enough to take across that bridge! Including all that they knew or more likely, all that they thought they knew about life on this side! Even then? The chances of them arriving safe and sane in that far and distant land is anything but assured! The image of war refugees pouring out of the cities into the country side sticks in my mind. At first they will all be lugging all that they could carry with them. Clunking and bunmping slowly out of town... and many, even faced with the horrors that surround them are going to be unwilling to part with their "treasures!" So when exhaustion sets in, they are going to sit down, clutch their stuff, and there in the midst of all the others cast off junk they will die!
Who knows? Maybe the army won't cross? Maybe there might be a way for them to eek out a living here in the detritus and dead! Certainly some have! The net is filled with those who make Pink Essence's and TS Road Maps, but make no mistake! For all their noise, they are very few and very far between and having burnt their bridge and being unwilling to leave what was theirs, they are simply making the best of a very bad situation by feeding on you, and they are not and never will be one step closer to girl town than they were when they also sat down! Again... look at their numbers... how many do you think can live upon the hapless who followed them? Certainly not the hapless who will stupidly render their own flesh at their bidding so those few may stay contented and full?
No Dear ones! If you are one of those from Blog Town playing with matches on the bridge to the wastes of Jender, it might behoove you to consider long and hard what awaits you on the other side! You spent a life time playing by man rules... Are you really ready now to play by girl rules for the rest of your life? To be judged ONLY on your looks and to be found sorely wanting? To be willingly subservient to men and still ignored? To accept the complete loss of your male privileges while you watch other, still men exercise theirs? To know all that you once had will never be yours again? Are you willing to accept this struggle and see it to completion knowing your chances of success are minuscule and even then, it will take the rest of your life?
If the answer to any of those is no... then I strongly suggest that you keep your matches at home! Cross the bridge if you want! Put on a frock and play in the wastelands to your hearts content, but remember... when the devil is in your ear telling you how it will be all better if that bridge were gone... The odds are, that it will be anything but!
Sunday, December 9, 2012
That being of course the "I would if I could, but I can't!"
By this Miz Know It All is of course referring to the 101 reasons touted over and over and over again why all those poor sufferers in Jenderville must get their rights as women right now, cause they simply cannot ever get surgery!!
Oh but where angels fear to tread, Miz Know It All will stout heartedly go! So if you are ready campers. Lets debunk the whole "I can't myth" shall we?
Starting with, "It's too expensive!"
Really? If you had cancer and were going to die from it, you simply could not find the funds no matter what? Wow! Really sucks to be you doesn't it! Oh! I see! That is an entirely different situation! Umm hummm... and how might it be different may I ask? I mean the prevailing reason given for everyone out there doing this is that you simply must transition! Because if you do not transition then you will most certainly die by your hand. Worse, you will die oh so soon! Well now! Dead is dead in my book! Doesn't really matter if you are hit by a train, hit by lighting, eaten by wolverines or you eat yourself! Dead is still dead isn't it?
So then if you simply MUST transition to being a woman or most certainly die, then surgery is also a must do! N'est-ce pas? Yep, it most certainly has to be, because while I do so hate to be the bearer of bad news, females simply do not have peckers! Nope! Really! They don't! Those cross dressing guys are welcome to play The Emperor's New Clothes all they like and jolly good for them, but if there's still a pecker in them thar panties, that means the bearer of said pecker is still a male! So if it must be woman or die... Then surgery it is!
Anyway. Miz Know It All is a wise woman and she knows her readers are smart as tacks too! So we will simply go with the assumption everyone here understands this most basic of concepts and move on to the how the heck do you get the money? Which after all is a far more mysterious concept!
So what is the first thing you are going to get this seemingly mind numbing sum of money? You do what your Grand Parents or Great Grand Parents did back in the depression. You cut your expenses! If something is not directly related to your basic survival then out it goes! Cable TV? Poof! Gone! High Speed Internet! Bye Bye! Coffee at Starbucks? Gone! Pre-prepared foods of any sort? Way gone! Eating out? You gotta be kidding! That is soooo Gone! MKIA says! "Get thee a cook book!" Best part is when you are done transition you will also be a pretty darn good and VERY creative cook!
Alcohol of any form? Too bad, it's Gone! Drugs? Really? That is sooo Gone! Cell service other than the most basic you have to survive? It is also Gone! Car payment? Really? Car payments? If you can afford that nice a car, then you are certainly not trying too hard to get this done are you? Sell that mill stone round your neck like yesterday, and if you simply must have a car to get to work then, get thee a klunker! Cars can be had for a grand or less and when these cheap but dying dinosaurs pass on. You simply pull the tags and get another! Bada Boom, Baba Bing!
House payment? If you got one of these, then get your lazy ass the hell right outta here! You're wasting my time and your's kevetching about not having any money! You are sitting in your surgery, so STFU!! Apartment? Well now! That's more like it! About that one, you are going start looking here and now to totally re-think things housing wise, which may mean looking even on the worst side of town till you can find what has to be the cheapest apartment or even a house possible with as many rooms as possible, then you are going to get yourself some roomers! Shazam! You just turned what was a monthly expense into monthly income! So is it going to be lots and lots O' fun to not have your own space? Heck no! It will bite ass big time, but it doesn't matter does it because this is to save your life remember and that is one heck of a BIG chunk of money!
Doing all the above in two years time will return a breathtakingly amazing sum of money but it is not going to be enough by itself to get you to where you want to be! That is unless you have it in you to save for say five years, but the clock is ticking here and you are going to take your own life so soon remember? This means you have to have more income and like now!
This means extra work doesn't it? Go out young woman, and get thee a night job at 7-11... or Walmart, or any grocery store, big box store, etc etc etc, ETC! There will be plenty of time to sleep later when your life is not in eminent jeopardy! As long as you can find the time for six to eight hours sleep, even if it is broken up into smaller chunks, it still leaves you 16 hours a day, seven days a week to make money! But these jobs don't pay squat. right? Not worth the time it takes to do em?
OK, Lets look at the 7-11 night clerk job shall we?
Say you work 20 hrs a week, (leaves you time for a third job doesn't it) paying no more than minimum wage. That's a whole $7.25 an hour x 20 = $145.00 a week. Certainly nothing to write home about, but this is your second job right? So times that by all 52 weeks What you want a vacation? No way in hell Missy! This is your life at risk remember! That means you will have $7, 540 minimum at the end of the year before taxes! So lets assume that will take $1,000, it's not going to but lets be generous here! That still leaves you with a net of $6,000! Minimum!This by the way is half the cost of the best SRS surgery in Thailand, or if you are willing to take a bit more of a risk.. nearly the entire sum needed at one of the lesser known docs there!
Wait a second! You are saying that inside of a year you can have the money for SRS just by working a second job? Yep! And if you add in the savings you got from cutting expenses to the bone, you should have the airfare and miscellaneous expenses too! If you want to extend this second job to two years, then you have over $12,000 cash in hand and the savings from cutting expenses to the bone should equal at least half that again! So we are talking a minimum, repeat MINIMUM of $16,000... You can get a lot of SRS pretty much anywhere for that much money!
But! You say you gotta have an FFS too, and what of a BA? Everyone knows that any woman worth her salt has those amazingly huge ta-tas, and besides! You just cannot seem to get any work where you are, much less a freaking second job!
No worries! Just leave it to Miz Know It All to have "The Answers!"
Campers! What you need to do is consider The Exciting World of Long Haul Trucking!Yep! You are going to embark on what is going to be one l-o-n-g and VERY profitable road trip! First you sell everything you own other than some clothes! You then start calling round, and inside of two weeks, I guarantee that no matter how badly you pass as female, barring any DUI's, felony arrest records, or rampant drug usage, you are going to be at a trucking school which will be paid for in advance by your new employer!
Once you have finished your two or three weeks of schooling, it is time for your on the road training, which is going to be another three weeks to a month WITH PAY, after which you will be given your own truck! Which by the way, and this is the really great part of this for making money for surgery! This truck is also going to be your Brand New Home! That's right! You will have a roof over your head for as long as you want it FREE OF CHARGE! That first year alone will find you bringing in close to $40.000... That's right, and with almost no expenses! Forty Thousand Dollars! Even deducting for the cost of your school and your VERY meager living expenses... again expenses are the most bare bones possible which means you WILL be eating ALL your meals from a hot pot or toaster oven in the truck. You can expect to have in your hot little hand at the end of the year, at least $20,000.00 to $30,000.00! Twenty to Thirty Thousand dollars in your first year alone! Times that by two years and assuming no raises, which is not going to be the case at all! You're at at least $40,000.00 to $60,000.00 richer! Times three years... wow that is now at least $60,000.00 at the minimum! SIXTY THOUSAND DOLLARS! That M'Dear is nothing to sneeze at in my book! If you were to go to one of the best doctors in the world, say Suporn for example, that would give you the full works, SRS BA FFS, along with airfare and living expenses for at least three months... and still leave you close to $12,000 to start a new life!
We are talking three years of hard work and mean living in exchange for the rest of your life! That sounds like one hell of a bargain to me!
Oh but the money isn't the only reason, "you can't!" You can't because of all these dire medical problems you have that are all absolute contraindications to any surgery! Oh I see.. and those would be what exactly? Oh? You don't know right off the bat but you know they are dire! Well as usual, Miz Know It All knows the right answer!
The primary contraindications for SRS are,
- Poorly controlled diabetes.
- Severe hypertension.
- Deep vein thrombosis
- Infection ~with~ HIV.
And of course... severe mental illness.
These are (with the exception of being barking mad) major life threats and they need to be dealt with ASAP, or your getting SRS or not isn't really going to matter is it? So cold as it may be, this one kinda sorta takes care of itself doesn't it... Oh and for the record... THESE ARE NOT ABSOLUTE CONTRAINDICATIONS! They are simply factors which should be dealt with before an voluntary surgery, but that said, you can still find doctors out there willing to take the risk if it is important enough for you to risk it as well! Miz Know It All remembers one brave sister who dying of cancer, and knowing that the surgery would shorten her life, that is if she even survived the surgery itself, still had an SRS because it really was that important to her... Oh and for the record she survived the surgery but it did shorten her life by at least half of her remaining days, but she was completely happy with her decision! She died a female!
So ! Given that Transsexuals occur at a rate of one in 36,000, (that's one in thirty six thousand) births, the chances that you would you would have it and one of these other conditions is very unlikely isn't it! Far far less than your chances of getting hit by a meteor for example! Not impossible mind you, but the occurrence would be so amazingly rare that it sorta begs the argument doesn't it?
So there ya go! The money can be had if one is simply willing to become creative and to sacrifice to get it...and there really are pretty darn few reasons one cannot have the surgery medically... Now that you know the truth of it? May I ask the $64,000.00 Question?
What really is holding YOU back?
Saturday, December 8, 2012
But what does this mean? This "Passing?" Does it mean nothing more than the villagers didn't come out in force today with pitchforks and torches thirsting for the blood of trans monsters wandering en Femme? Or does it mean that the person in question was actually being perceived as being "the opposite sex?"
Actually? In the New Speak of Trans Land, (heretofore also known as the land of Misfit Toys!) It means both and it also means all points between. For when one says they are passing it could simply mean that some semblance of cultural acknowledgement was made towards them, or it might mean they have not and cannot be read as their birth sex, and all points between
Which is why Miz Know It All is going to delight her readers by dragging out an oldie but still goodie written over a decade back by a talented writer who went by the Nom de Plume Kate Grimaldi... Kate wrote this back in the day after a forum interaction with a sister about their "Passing." Which when they said "Passing" they were expressing having not been read in decades, when up piped another voice who said they too were not read! Well not very often! Why in fact it hadn't happened to them more than twice that very day!
Decades... hours... minutes, same terms, very very VERY different meanings...
Thus was born "The Stepped Phase Scale," This scale of Kate's was composed of six levels.
- Step 0, No passing
- Step 1, Pass in a crowd
- Step 2, Pass with longer person-to-person interactions
- Step 3, Passing with a lover
- Step 4, Sustained Passing
- Step 5, Having your memory rewrite itself
- Step 6, Knowing that you have always been female
The Null Step,
This is that guy in a wig we all know and love so so well.. but want nothing to do with at all! The one who no matter what he says about how he is a woman is so clearly a man in a dress he is going to be read by a blind man at midnight from half a mile away... Therefore he does not and cannot be said to pass in anyway-shape-form-or-fashion!
The First Step,
That is simply you walking into the Mall and the torches are not lit! In fact, no one says a darn thing to you ,so you are pretty much left to your own devices. What this means passing wise is you have reached the point were you are rated as a threat to others on par with the potted plants, and so, you are ignored... "Wow that was a damned ugly woman. Hummm I gotta remember to get some toothpaste and I need to call Uncle Bob when I get home! I wonder what we are having for dinner?"
The Second step,
The one Miz Know It All thinks most often applies when she reads about some 60 something whoo ups and says they are "Passing," Because the Second Step, is nothing more than "Passing" a little longer than the quick glance... We humans are biologically programmed to sex each other and we do it in a fraction of a second, but we are also busy as heck and very VERY self centered... Which means that 99% of us pay almost no attention to the person on the other side of a counter from us, other than to do what we must to make them go away... So if there are enough social clues one way or the other to make a rather rudimentary assessment, we sex em based on that alone and then think nothing more of it! Wow, that sure is one ugly woman but it mostly looks female. So... the clerk or the waiter, or the bank teller is going to say "Can I help you Ma'am?" This is the level where you notice that doors are usually held open, men tip their hats, etc etc etc... It is where society acknowledges you as female... sorta
The Third Step,
Getting Hot and Heavy, Kate took a lot of heat for this one being third, but over the years I have come to see why she put it where she did. This is the point where you have either had surgery or you are not far away and you have come to accept that the world sees you as a female, so you start to spread your wings a bit and worry less, and when we do that, we hit others, or might I say, they "Hit" upon us? Hummmm? Your appearance at this point is at least feminine enough that you have become exactly what most women are to men. A sexual object! Now before you let that go to your head. remember most men would gladly fuck a knot hole on a tree if it was wet and willing! Really! Men are not all choosie about what they fuck, at least if no one is looking! So take this with a grain of salt and see it for what it really is passing wise...
The Fourth Step,
Wow this is the toughy! If there was ever a line in the sand that you could point to vis-a-vie and say most do not and will not make it this far... then SP 4 is it! What this level of passing means is that you are not getting read on the sly... That after days, weeks, months or even years of passing as female in daily interactions, that your little secret is not quietly found out! That you are able to keep it going day in and day out without fail and the important part? Without thought on your part... Something which if you do fail at, you are not too likely to discover unless you are keenly observant of the little changes in others behavior... Because at this point, they have come know and probably to like you! So what if you turn out, not to be a girl but to be that sweet guy, I mean girl, guy, girl, oh heck the one over yonder who use to be a guy! They are still going to be nice to you, but trust me, if you do not make it here, they may be nice as pie but they will never accord you the same as they would with another other woman... No set ups with their brothers for example... or they will always change of subject when it comes to intimate and personal conversations... Step Four is make or break, and as Miz Know It All said... few make it to, much less past this point.
But if you do, there are more!
The Fifth Step,
If you have been paying attention you have noticed that these steps are not remotely equal.. that in each one the level of passing is on a whole order greater than the last... so by now I am sure you are wondering why this has switched gears so... How can your memory change? And what has that to do with "Passing" fer Christs sake! Well the how is simple... you have moved on from others not reading you to you yourself are not reading you! This is where you can finally look into the mirror of either your mind or your eye and only see a female..As to why? It's curious how this one happens but happen it does... So much so that if you are looking at old pictures, that is if you have come this far and any still exist! You will be looking, not for a male child but for that bright eyed little girl that you remember yourself because that is what you were! So even though there is a familiarity about that boy there in her stead, he only seems familiar to you in what is the most surreal of ways!
The Sixth Step
This is where actually have moved past, "Passing" because you have come to realize when looking back that you are and always have been female. That no matter how dearly it has cost you or how much you suffered... you did what you had to do because you were a female doing the very best she could with the ugly hand she was dealt! This is also the hardest one to relate to others because it simply cannot be understood all this really means and why you are now so distant to everyone in the "community" until you actually get there! Kinda like sexual intercourse is. You can have read everything every written about it, have heard all the stories but as a virgin, that in no way can begin to prepare you for what it actually feels like when a man is playing your arching body like a violin as he penetrates you. Ya just gotta live it to know it... but trust me, this level of "Passing" really does exist and dare I say it.. there are even realms beyond it, but the women I know of who have gotten that far? Well, I can count em on one hand...
Well, there you have it... So the next time someone is talking about their passing... you can now ask em exactly what they mean by that and by their responses... you will know how well they really "Pass!"
SP Scale (c) Kate Grimaldi
Sunday, December 2, 2012
In all the faiths which spring from the loins of Abraham, there is a story of the fall of man. A sad tale in which the divine had given to his children a world of wonder and joy! A world without pain or suffering. A world which was theirs to do with as they wanted, as long as Adam and Eve, and one would assume, their progeny did not consume the one and only fruit forbidden to them. Why the divine created such a thing or why she placed it there... Well who knows the minds of the gods!
Well as we all know, Satan convinced first Eve then though her, Adam to take a bite... After all this was paradise and what harm could come from such a little thing? Course what is done cannot be undone, and so our hapless mythical forefather and mother were chastised by the divine and sent packing out into the cold cold world where they would have to find their way midst the stones and rocks!
In the land of Blog-O-Stan there is also a forbidden fruit! This one thing tiny little thing which is so utterly terrible, that to simply cast ones eyes upon it has been known to have caused great spells of apoplexy and even the vapors!
What pray tell is this horror of horrors found midst the wonderful and happy land of the gender variant? Are you sure you really want to know campers? You know, that as it was with our hapless mythical fore fathers and mothers... what is known cannot be unknown! You still want to know eh? Better sit down then campers and hold onto your pretty pink frocks cause Miz Know It All, (heretofore known as Satan) is gonna tell ya!
This horror of horrors is the (thankfully damned few) feckless creatures known as ... ~Transsexuals~ ! Yes! Those pain in the ass, think they are female and male despite what is twixt their legs so they gotta cut off what God give em whores! Those ungrateful so and so's who cannot for the life of them see how they fit so lovely into the wonderful spectrum of gender expression! Those rude bastards, having been born with cocks like everyone else in Gender-Ville, yet who would callowly renounce their membership in the divine LGBT! Those Heretics who even go so far as to mutilate their God given bodies, and in the doing loose forever the utter joy of sticking their precious dicks into something warm and wet! All this so they, vile evil that they are, can trick some poor unsuspecting straight man into having sex with em!?! Woe unto us! For these sad creatures, as crazy as bat shitas they might be for thinking themselves different, are still our kin! So we must from all the goodness in our hearts find ways to bring them to the light! We must find ways no matter how much it may hurt them, to make them see how foolish are their doings, and how they were, are, and how no matter what always will be simply crossdressers like us who got really really really carried away! For happiness will certainly be theirs if they can only find it within themselves to whip off their wigs was we all do, and proclaim loudly to the world that they are (or were before their mutilation) really men... If we can only have the patience and love to bring them under of our wide umbrella of love, their pointless sacrifice of flesh and blood and tears will not have been in vain! Why just by their proud and noble example once they are known, the legions of would-of-could-of's-if-only will be emboldened too to cast off their hated male raiment, and take up the sparkly and revealing frocks of joy!
No Campers... No... Please! Relax! Miz Know It All has not suddenly taken leave of her senses! She simply though that as it was indeed a Sunday, her little biblical analogy might be... ahem... (amen?) entertaining! I mean, Hyperbole aside. There really is one, and it seems ONLY one forbidden narrative in the great spectrum of umbrella land! That being the obviously hateful and homophobic all inclusive white bread'sexual/physical/mental/spiritual two sex binary aspiration! Why one can and will be welcomed with open arms into the wonderful T community of gender expression even if one ID's as an adult baby girl, ne. 60 year old bald man! It matters not what your kink, shame or discomfort may be, all are welcome if one but embrasses their inner and outer queerness! Why look how simple it is to become a "trans-"man simply by binding ones hated breasts and cutting off ones hair! Periods? Meh! Stuff another tampon in there cause who has to know! Erections scaring the kiddies? That's what the frilly petticoats you long for hide! Cause out here in the land of Glee, it is the donning of those pretty pretty frocks and rubber cocks that is all it takes to "express" ones true self! Here in the land where the glitter bombs grow, one can indeed be a trans man, then a trans woman and then a trans man again all in the space of a hour if one feels that is who they "truly" are... For it's all about their gender queerness you see and nothing more... All of it expressed into being by these worldly trappings which "the other sex" uses to provide sexual clues and often cause arousal to the other sex is what truly makes one a man or a woman... doesn't it? Yes by God it does here under the loving laws of Gender-Ville! A grand and wonderful place were we break those mean old suffocating paradigms of a bigoted binary sex by substituting what seems a pretty well defined and rather rigid set of gender clues... but here is the good part! In Gender-Ville, they are worn by... THE OTHER SEX! Wait I think I meant THE OTHER GENDER! Whew... close one there!
Sadly, this means that despite our expansive love for those... shudder to say it, Transsexuals, there is indeed no room in the inn for those few deluded folks as long as they just want to get surgery, fix documents and go forth into the straight world! Those pretty pretty folk who for reasons that elude us, just don't get it how honored they should be when they are outed to the world by their brothers and sisters of the frock! Thankfully if they haven't the balls to do it, then there are legions of others of a much better mind who are more than happy to do it for em!
Still, Why, might you ask? Why do these heretics want to pass on the utter joys of telling everyone they might encounter in their lives that they too are really "Trans?" Why should they give up so much and in the doing it seems, throw their "Trans" brethren under the bus, by their not being out there as the shining examples of what "Trans" really is? Why is it they cannot see all the great and beautiful things that the "Trans Activists" have done for them too by bravely creating a third sex and in including them too? So what if they want to love and be loved by men... No problem! With a membership in the LGBT and Marriage Equality they can be just as gay as they want! ( Yeah I know! Yuck... Why even the idea of sucking a dick? How gross!) Yet they still protest to us! They say that they are all for Marriage Equality but... even if they do want to have a hard dick in em (no matter how repulsive the idea is to the rest of us in Genderville,) they are not gay men, they insist that because they are "simply" women and not "trans" and that as most women do, they love men cause they are (extremely deluded I know!) straight! And get this... they want the rest of the world to think that same bit of homo-trans-phobic rubbish!
Why is it that cannot learn from the examples of these proud trans-women-activists-lesbians who have a... what did they call it again, oh yes, a lady stick just-a-itching to break some of that good old cotton ceiling, just like they were doing as men with the little woman for all those years before they figured out they were lesbian! Yummm yumm!
Well! Thankfully there are many many hard working souls out there who have these sad if pretty trans-gendered creatures best interests in mind even if they don't... So from me to you here is a MKIA tip of the hat to all of our hard working out you in a split second Gender Missionaries from the Nutmeg to the Beaver states who day in and day out are out preaching to the unwashed with their constant education and outreach! Cause as we all know! In the proud "inclusive" New Speak of Gender-Ville if the lie is said often enough to enough people it becomes the truth! So all hail sex = gender = trans = sex!